If Lady Gaga played basketball: shooting guard, rated 79

Lady Gaga as a basketball player: scouting report

Lady Gaga opened her Super Bowl halftime show in 2017 by appearing to leap off the roof of the stadium in Houston, and she would play shooting guard with the same appetite for a big entrance. Her real strength, though, is the planning behind the spectacle. Her basketball IQ is the top mark on her card and her playmaking is next, so she is the two guard who initiates offense, reads the help defense and finds the open teammate.

She started playing piano as a small child and studied at the Tisch School of the Arts at New York University, then proved her range by recording jazz albums with Tony Bennett and sharing an Oscar for writing Shallow from A Star Is Born. That range carries over to the defensive end, where she grades out well; she guards with the effort of a performer who never coasts through a show, and she is happy to pick up the ball in the backcourt. Her jumper is steady rather than special, so she scores more by reading the defense than by overpowering it.

Rebounding is the honest weak spot and the lowest mark on her card. She is a guard who wants to run, not wrestle, so her team needs a big who controls the glass. Point guard is a natural second home, since her passing is the best tool she has, and small forward is possible at a larger cost. Draft her in the middle rounds as a secondary creator, pair her with a scoring wing who can finish what she sets up, and let her keep reinventing the offense.

Plays like A playmaking two guard who defends with relentless energy

Put Lady Gaga in your lineup

8 rolls, a starting five and a bench, 82 games. Can you go 82-0? Free, no account.