If Leonardo DiCaprio played soccer: goalkeeper, rated 82

Leonardo DiCaprio as a soccer player: scouting report

Leonardo DiCaprio is a goalkeeper because no position rewards patience like this one. He collected several Oscar nominations before finally winning Best Actor for The Revenant, and a keeper spends most of a match the same way: waiting, staying sharp and being ready for the one moment that decides everything.

Goalkeeping is the best part of his card, and dribbling is the surprise second best mark. That makes him a keeper who can take a touch to beat a pressing striker instead of hacking the ball into the stands. He has been acting since he was a teenager, from television roles to Titanic and on to his long run of films with Martin Scorsese, and that comfort under bright lights is exactly what a keeper needs when a crowd whistles at every goal kick. His pace lets him come off his line quickly to smother a through ball, and his passing is good enough to pick out a fullback on the run. He also started an environmental foundation in 1998, so expect strong opinions about the state of the grass in his penalty area.

Shooting is the weakest mark on his card, which is no issue for a man who will spend his afternoon between the posts. His pace and dribbling make fullback a workable second spot, and central midfield rates about the same, but the drop from goal is steep. Put a commanding center back in front of him, take him in the keeper rounds, and trust that he will be ready when the big moment finally arrives.

Plays like A patient shot stopper who is calm with the ball at his feet

Put Leonardo DiCaprio in your lineup

11 rolls, a starting eleven, 38 matches. Can you go 38-0? Free, no account.